The Prize

We need a more tangible prize for our 2012 Primary wager, rather than some abstract notion like "glory" or "honor". Can you spread honor onto a kaiser roll? I think not. So, that in mind, I unveil the 2012 Republican Primary Race GRAND PRIZE:


The "Mustard of Glory"

This bottle of generic-brand mustard has sat on my desk since early February. I don't recommend you eat it directly, or as an accompaniment to food. However, it had only one previous owner: James Bond. Some folks say that the famous MI6 agent used this mustard on a turkey sandwich, which he consumed just prior to intercourse with a beautiful live girl. You might be wondering how I obtained a jar of mustard that was owned by a fictional spy, or why it's a relevant prize anyway. Well, I don't have an answer to that. However, my scientist, Dr. Cody, spends his days in a tin shed, deep inside a small canyon outside of San Bernadino...

There you have it folks, the die is cast. Pick a winner, acquire the mustard. Perhaps you too can enjoy intercourse with a beautiful live girl.